Before we start I must warn you that this article could end up getting very deep and very personal.
I have battled with my mind from a very early age and grew up doing nothing but trying to hide that away. My family didn’t understand it and thought I was just acting out and then as I got older I started getting accused of doing drugs when I withdrew.
That caused me and my family to drift apart and we never did end up ever making amends.
At the age of 18 my first daughter was born but developed incredibly bad asthma which wasn’t treated back then as well as it is now. When Rio was three years old I woke up in the night to hear her coughing so went to check up on her. I knew that something wasn’t right so shouted for my partner who rang 999. My daughter died in my arms that night at three years old, me barely an adult withdrew even further.
In those next few days I did the worst possible thing that I could ever have done and I withdrew even from my partner without understanding that she too was going through the same thing as me.
Three days later Kelly committed suicide and I was all alone again to try and deal with all this that I considered to be my fault. No friends, no family, what was the point. I’m not going to lie, I have tried to end my life many times before and had many hospital stays but I’m still here and there must be a reason for that.
While hotlines like The Samaritans are wonderful it isn’t really a solution to long-term sufferers of severe depression. For us, we need to learn to try and deal with our thoughts ourselves. But how?
I am going to say something brutally honest but something that I believe you should hear.
The hardest thing that you will ever do in your life is resist your suicidal thoughts.
I understand that many of our readers are not believers and that is fine but what do you have to lose when you already feel like you have hit your limit. When severe depression makes the rounds it is all too easy to feel like we are alone when in reality, it is us that make ourselves alone because we just want to withdraw.
If you are fighting with suicidal thoughts then you probably don’t feel very close to God but these thoughts can be fought by trusting in Him and walking in the Christian faith. Study the bible and read aloud the Hope within.
Avoid Drink and/or Drugs
Drink and drugs do nothing for depression except make it worse. They can not help your thoughts to miraculously change from bad thoughts to good thoughts. They will distort your mind even further. If at this time, you are already using drink and drugs, you have to stop.
List Your Distractions
Everybody has things that they enjoy doing and that they can do to take their mind off of other things. Take some time out to sit down and write a list of all of your favourite distractions. What have you done in the past to overcome hardship? Also make lists of your best friends, favourite places, music, movies, etc.
Identify Your Triggers
Every human emotion has one or more triggers that set it off and in order to fight an emotion or a thought then we must first identify what triggered it. It could be certain people or places that trigger certain thoughts about suicide. It could be that you are not sleeping enough or eating poorly. At the beginning, it is often quite hard to identify the triggers but there will always be a pattern. Once you know the triggers, you can start working at avoiding them.
Deal with the Problem
If your suicidal thoughts are down to a specific issue that happened in the past and that has gone unresolved, it needs to be dealt with in order to get past it. This may be a person that has abused you either physically or emotionally and I won’t lie, it is not going to be an easy step but you will be a lot stronger afterwards.
This has actually always been the hardest thing for me to do during my dark moments. I have always found it difficult to start up a conversation but just being around good people helps. You need a good and strong support network that can help you to get through this time in your life. This can also help to remove the feelings of isolation which often accompany suicidal thoughts. If you don’t try and connect then you WILL be alone and that should never happen in today’s society.
I know you probably don’t feel like doing much exercise when you’re depressed as I get that way too but exercise has many great benefits to our health. Physical exercises have been shown to reduce the effects of depression and anxiety. Try and get a friend involved to keep you motivated and on schedule. Even a 45 minute walk each day with your friend is a huge step towards improving your mental health.
Are You Sleeping Properly?
I quickly mentioned about sleep being a possible trigger earlier in the article but just wanted to slightly expand on that for you. Depression will often change your sleep patterns and will make you either sleep too much or not enough. Research has shown that there is a link between suicidal thoughts and sleep patterns many times before. The human body needs between seven and eight hours sleep each night in order to function correctly and keep our thinking positive.
Seek Professional Help
I lived through most of my earlier adult years thinking that I had to get through this alone. I was too embarrassed to tell anybody that I wasn’t OK and whenever they’d ask, I’d always say that I was fine. My situation probably escalated farther than it should because I was too proud for too long. There is help out there.
I am now currently on medication for my depression and anxiety but you should also take note of your local suicide prevention hotlines and use them the next time that you feel like you’ve had enough.
Depression is not a game.
You are not weak for asking for help.
Hold out your hand, someone will take it.
Have some extra tips to share? Let us hear them in the comments below and please do help us out by sharing this guide on your social media channels.